Absurd and Askew

I was reading an article today on CNN's site about trusting your gut. They made mention of how trusting your gut in a relationship would save you a lot of heartache and I was reminded of my favorite "cheating spouse" story. The best part is, it's a true story. I didn't know this couple firsthand, but I knew the woman in passing. The story was relayed to me by a mutual friend and I've never heard a better one, before or since.


The couple wasn't actually married, but living together. They shared, among other things, keys to one another's cars. For a few months she had been suspicious that he was cheating on her with a co-worker of his that they both knew. He often called her to say he had to stay late at work. Eventually she got fed up with what she was sure was lies despite all of his denials, so the next time he called to say he was working late, she jumped in her car and drove to the other woman's apartment.

Parked there in front of the co-worker's apartment was her boyfriend's car. She parked next to him. I'm assuming she might have sat there for a moment trying to decide how best to go about confronting the cheater. I don't know that for sure, of course, but I add it with literary license because I can see her doing it, turning over different scenarios in her mind. Should she find a pay phone (this was before everyone and his brother had a cell phone) and call the woman's number and ask for him, or should she simply go straight up to the door and knock? Instead, she did something I really admire.

She got out of her car that she had parked there next to his and, using the key to his car that she had on her keychain, she climbed into his car and drove back home. Not a word. No confrontation at all. When he walked out and saw her car sitting there instead of his own, he knew he'd been caught. He reluctantly got into her car and drove home, most likely conceiving all the different excuses he could come up with to get himself out of hot water. He didn't have a chance to use any of them.

When he got home, he found his car crammed full with his clothing and everything else of his that she could stuff into it. She asked him for her car key back, and the one to their apartment, gave him back the key to his car, and sent him on his way.

What I love about this is that there was no arguing. He had to suffer the drive home knowing that she knew, but I'm pretty sure he never expected her to pack his belongings into his car and give him his walking papers without the chance to "explain." She basically just wiped her hands of him.

She's my hero. :)

In a quiet office, my tennis shoes squeak. It's not something I notice anywhere else. It's only here, where there's no noise but that of the forced air and the ticking of the clock on my desk. (I haven't turned on any music yet. It's still early.) The few people here are silently tucked away in their own offices working on something or another. I just got back inside from a smoke break and, as I'm walking down the hallway to my office, I notice how loudly my tennis shoes are squeaking. I thought it important enough to blog about only because it brought me to another thought. That's how my mind works. Click. Click. Click. Most of it random nonsense.

Shoes that normally go unnoticed are hugely noticeable in the midst of such a hushed environment.

Little things in life that normally go unnoticed are hugely noticeable in the midst of a quietly stable environment.

See the connection?

Sometimes I get so bored with life that all the little annoyances that normally go unnoticed become these big, looming issues. Why? Because routine is not my friend, and in the quiet, calm of routine I start to search for something to which I can pay attention. BAM! There they are, these little nothings staring me in the face and daring me to confront them. I don't take challenge lightly; I meet it head-on. Even when all logic tells me it's not important, damn it, they dared me, and thus I must address them.

Stupid.

I've read all the "don't sweat the small stuff" books and heard all the advice about not "making mountains out of molehills." I know that logically I should just ignore these tiny nothings because they really are a bunch of inconsequential crap, but boredom exaggerates them. Addressing a pile of inconsequential crap is something to do that breaks the monotany. It's not right. It's not helpful. It definitely doesn't make life easier. But maybe that's the point. I don't like it when everything is too easy and there's no challenge, no goals, no uphill battles, no feeling of victory when I've defeated one of them.

Wow. I truly am my own worst enemy.

Click. Click. Click.

One would think, with all that drive to be challenged and satisfaction of achievement when I've reached a goal, that I would be highly competitive. I'm not. Not in the least. I just can't stand to be idle. If I'm not creating something, I'm fixing something. If I'm not doing either of those, I'm learning something new. I'm not happy unless I'm submersed in busy-ness. I have to have a goal. I don't care if that goal is to get the dust bunnies out from under the couch on X day, I have to have something planned to accomplish or I get bored. Quickly.

To my husband, that probably makes me high maintenance. The thing is, I don't look to him to entertain me, but I don't want him bringing me down either. The worst part for him is probably when I do get bored and I start turning those inconsequential nothings into gotta-fix-it challenges. I guess that means that it's in his best interests that I stay occupied.

Life would probably be much easier if I would ignore the squeaky shoes.

In lieu of paying any attention at all to that other memorial happening today, I've created my own private memorial.

These are our soldiers that have given their lives for us since June 25, 2009 when the media went into a frenzy because of the untimely death of that other guy.

Where are the gold caskets for these guys and girls?

This list is incomplete, but it was the best I could do. If anyone has a name to add, please feel free to leave a comment.

6/25/09

• Brian N. Bradshaw, 24, Army 1st Lieutenant, Steilacoom, WA


• Joshua L. Hazlewood, 22, U.S. Army Reserve Specialist, Manvel, Texas

6/26/09

• Peter K. Cross, 20, U.S. Army Private 1st Class, Saginaw, TX

6/28/09

• Steven T. Drees, 19, U.S. Army Private, Peshtigo, WI


• Timothy A. David, 28, U.S. Army Sergeant, Gladwin, Michigan

6/29/09

• Terry J. Lynch, 22, U.S. Army Sergeant, Shepherd, MT


• Roger L. Adams Jr., 36, U.S. Army National Guard Sergeant, Jacksonville, NC


• Juan C. Baldeosingh, 30, U.S. Army National Guard Sergeant, Newport, NC


• Robert L. Bittiker, 39, U.S. Army National Guard Specialist, Jacksonville, NC


• Edward C. Kramer, 39, U.S. Army National Guard Sergeant 1st Class, Wilmington, NC

7/2/09

• Charles S. Sharp, 20, U.S. Marine Lance Corporal, Adairsville, GA

7/4/09

• Aaron E. Fairbairn, 20, U.S. Army Private 1st Class, Aberdeen, WA


• Justin A. Casillas, 19, U.S. Army Private 1st Class, Dunnigan, CA

7/6/09

• 6 yet unnamed U.S. Army soldiers killed Afghanistan

IT IS THE SOLDIER

It is the Soldier, not the minister
Who has given us freedom of religion.

It is the Soldier, not the reporter
Who has given us freedom of the press.

It is the Soldier, not the poet
Who has given us freedom of speech.

It is the Soldier, not the campus organizer
Who has given us freedom to protest.

It is the Soldier, not the lawyer
Who has given us the right to a fair trial.

It is the Soldier, not the politician
Who has given us the right to vote.

It is the Soldier who salutes the flag,
Who serves beneath the flag,
And whose coffin is draped by the flag,
Who allows the protester to burn the flag.

--CHARLES M. PROVINCE

May they rest in peace.

Ok, so I wake up in the morning like this...



...and this is what inevitably happens...



Not fair.

Just rolling right over all my good efforts like that.

The tire marks are a bitch to scrub off.

Then I have to get all...



I don't like being like that. I'd rather be...



But when they don't let up...

...when they just can't quit rolling all over my good time...

...smashing my happiness back into the ground just as I've started to dust it off again...

...well, then...

...then...



Anybody got a few of these I can borrow...



I'll give them back when I'm done. Empty, of course, but I think the bottles are worth 5 cents each in Michigan or something.

There's an upheaval in Iran. Another terrorist bombing in Iraq. A Yemeni plane went down leaving one 14-year-old survivor from the 150 or so passengers aboard. A school bus stop shooting in Detroit that injured 7 kids ages 14 to 17 years old. And every news blurb I've received from CNN on my phone since last Friday all relate to Michael Jackson. Farrah died, too, after a very brave and tragic 3-year battle with cancer. Long-time household name Ed McMahon died earlier in the week. Attention to both deaths has been practically non-existent since Jacko died.

WTF?

Look, I understand Jackson was a pop legend and his passing was unexpected and all, but I consider details of his life, death, his kids' custody, the movement of his remains from this place to that place, the preparations for his viewing, and how many times his songs are being played to be SECONDARY news. Yes, I was surprised to learn that he died. Yes, I think he had a major impact on the entertainment industry. Yes, I think it's a shame. But ENOUGH ALREADY!


Why have the news groups (almost every single one of them) determined for us that any Michael Jackson-related news is the most important news of the day? Why when I was watching the first 45 minutes of NBC's Today show this morning was it dominated by interviews with various Michael Jackson insiders and speculation on his drug use/abuse and there was no mention made of the school bus shooting in Detroit yesterday that injured seven teens?

I agree that Michael Jackson's passing is newsworthy, and that details of it are newsworthy, but as PRIMARY news? No. It's ENTERTAINMENT news. Secondary news. I don't want to see news related to him at the top of the hour and news of the struggle in Iran or the shooting of some teens just waiting for a school bus bumped to the "after thought" position.

In case you hadn't heard, the House of Representatives held a moment of silence for Michael. Are you serious? Where's the moment of silence for Farrah and Ed, both pop culture icons as well, and both equally deserving of that kind of respect as long as they're doling it out?

The priorities of this country are bass-ackward, and they are unfortunately being dictated by what our journalists decide regarding what's the big news and what's the little news, what gets reported and what doesn't. If you want to know where the power is in this country, turn on one of the 24-hour news stations. It's not any of the newsmakers, it's the boys and girls who run those stations. They tell us what's important to us and what's not by deciding what goes at the top of the hour.

We just follow along like stupid sheep.